Is there a stigma attached to being single once you are approaching 30? Does it feel like when you say that you are single and if you are at least 30 years old (especially as a woman), people tend to act as if something is not right with you? Are there constant questions regarding when you are going to settle down and have kids.
“Your expectations are too high” is a phrase that is often said as it relates to single adults and who they choose to date. Should those that are not married lower their expectations and settle just for the sake of being able to say that they are no longer single? Of course you have to be willing to compromise with the person you are dating, but if you have a list of qualities/traits that are non-negotiable don’t feel like you have to lower those standards.
Your family and friends may want you to try speed dating, online dating, or they may even want to set you up on a blind date in hopes of helping you “find the one.” There isn’t anything wrong with your loved ones wanting to help, but they should ask if you interested before they just impose and start offering suggestions.
There are plenty of single adults who would love to be married by now and have kids, and then there are single adults who are not interested in being married or a parent at the moment. What most people fail to realize is the people who are single, of course, know they are single, so they are not trying to make that the focal point of their lives. Single adults cannot put their lives on hold because they still have to live out their dreams such as purchasing homes, traveling, advancing their careers, investing, and becoming financially stable.
An accomplishment as a single person, especially if you are approaching 30 can be overlooked when so many of your peers are getting engaged, getting married, having kids, etc. The new job you were offered or the house that you just bought, may seem small in comparison. It is still a great achievement and the only person that it should matter to is you.
As Valentine’s Day is approaching I urge you to practice self-care and self-love. Treat yourself to a movie, dinner, or a floral/ fruit arrangement. If you want to go to a concert or a movie, don’t be afraid to go alone. If you want to be around people, find ways to volunteer and give back to those in need. A night out with your friends is always an option and it is a good way to show you friends how much you value and appreciate them.
We are all on our own timeline. The purpose and the plan for our lives is specific to each and every one of us. I encourage you to keep living your best life, to keep going after your dreams, to travel, and to never settle for less than you deserve.
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